it was a short-lived relationship between me and the ArmyMan. We'd been exclusive for a week before i got that pit in my stomach. i attributed it to school nerves since i was just beginning classes up at Westminster College for the summer. After i could tell the school nerves had dissipated, i could still feel that pit. i hadn't slept well for a couple of nights and so took the time to pray about why i was still feeling this way. What could possibly be wrong?
Then i knew why.
As much as i always thought if the ArmyMan and i were to be together it would be a for sure 'yes'....it isn't. it's quite the opposite. For whatever reason (which is unknown because he'd been a really great boyfriend) it isn't right for us. And i knew it in my core.
When we ended up talking about it, he let me know that he'd actually had the same feeling for a few days; the feeling that we weren't right for each other.
Things ended with us wishing the best for each other and no hard feelings over our relationship not panning out. After all, it's best we follow that prompting and find what is right for us rather than try and force anything.
We are still friends, in a way. We're not not-friends but we also aren't buddy-buddy either. And i'm ok with that; because i know it's for the best and that things will work out in each of our favor in the end.
Friday, June 13, 2014
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
a real-life teacher (the story)
it's truly amazing how this opportunity played out. i had applied for nearly 20 summer jobs and was attempting to network for Fall teaching positions since my USOE license was still being processed; none of them were panning out. Then a previous colleague recommends Walden.
From the moment i walked in and was greeted by the elementary director, i knew this was where i wanted to be. it just felt...right. The initial interview was short and to the point with some light-hearted discussion. An appointment was immediately made for the following day to volunteer in the classroom i would potentially teach. Let me tell you, it only made me fall more in love with this school. While i wasn't extremely familiar with the Montessori teaching style, that short experience made me want to be an expert in it. The catch was, in order to be hired on for this position i would need to take part in a Montessori training program over the summer and the following school year (to this i thought "i'm still in school mode since i only just graduated, so now would be the perfect time to certify with another credential").
Things were discussed, i chatted with Westminster College (where i will be taking the program), and i decided that it was all worth it to teach at Walden.
That same week i was offered the position!
i was able to take the last couple of weeks of school to volunteer in the classroom and get to know my future students. My class will include a mix of first, second, and third graders (the 6-9 age group of the Montessori method); meaning that this year's first and second years will be my second and third years in the Fall.
Honestly, i believe that none of the other potential jobs worked out because i was meant to take this opportunity; to use my summer to certify in Montessori teaching and fill the position at this school. it's where i need to be.
From the moment i walked in and was greeted by the elementary director, i knew this was where i wanted to be. it just felt...right. The initial interview was short and to the point with some light-hearted discussion. An appointment was immediately made for the following day to volunteer in the classroom i would potentially teach. Let me tell you, it only made me fall more in love with this school. While i wasn't extremely familiar with the Montessori teaching style, that short experience made me want to be an expert in it. The catch was, in order to be hired on for this position i would need to take part in a Montessori training program over the summer and the following school year (to this i thought "i'm still in school mode since i only just graduated, so now would be the perfect time to certify with another credential").
Things were discussed, i chatted with Westminster College (where i will be taking the program), and i decided that it was all worth it to teach at Walden.
That same week i was offered the position!
i was able to take the last couple of weeks of school to volunteer in the classroom and get to know my future students. My class will include a mix of first, second, and third graders (the 6-9 age group of the Montessori method); meaning that this year's first and second years will be my second and third years in the Fall.
Honestly, i believe that none of the other potential jobs worked out because i was meant to take this opportunity; to use my summer to certify in Montessori teaching and fill the position at this school. it's where i need to be.
the armyman
The ArmyMan has recently reappeared in my life. Recently as in the last couple of months. Previously (due to his disappearance from my life for about a year) i had discounted any interest in him. Why pursue interest in someone who isn't reciprocating? And then a while after things ended with the Fireman, the ArmyMan reappeared. We hung out. We went on a couple of dates. i was still feeling the need to just be single and date because i wasn't quite sure i was even ready for another relationship or if i honestly knew what i wanted.
After letting the ArmyMan in on how i felt, he was ok to take things slow. Shortly afterwards i realized i actually only want to date him. Yep. i then had to prepare myself to let him know because any relationship between us was kind of resting on my shoulders since i wanted to take things slow (not to say that i want to rush things, but just that my feelings have been made up in regards to him).
He and i went on a drink run whilst chilling up at Miss Calah's. After a rather hilarious joke, i decided there was no time like the present to tell him my current thoughts.
"You know a few weeks ago when i told you i wanted to keep things slow? Well i've also realized since then that i only want to date you. So there's that" (Romantic, huh?)
That was that and we decided to be exclusive. Who'd have thought this would ever actually turn into something? Well whoever did, i'm glad because, let's face it, i'm rather excited it has turned into something.
After letting the ArmyMan in on how i felt, he was ok to take things slow. Shortly afterwards i realized i actually only want to date him. Yep. i then had to prepare myself to let him know because any relationship between us was kind of resting on my shoulders since i wanted to take things slow (not to say that i want to rush things, but just that my feelings have been made up in regards to him).
He and i went on a drink run whilst chilling up at Miss Calah's. After a rather hilarious joke, i decided there was no time like the present to tell him my current thoughts.
"You know a few weeks ago when i told you i wanted to keep things slow? Well i've also realized since then that i only want to date you. So there's that" (Romantic, huh?)
That was that and we decided to be exclusive. Who'd have thought this would ever actually turn into something? Well whoever did, i'm glad because, let's face it, i'm rather excited it has turned into something.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
a real-life teacher
The results are in, folks, and...i got the position! i couldn't be happier and i am so incredibly excited to join the team of teachers at this school. i was able to patch up the wee little bit of road to make this work. it feels correct; this is where i should be.
Before summer school starts, i have the opportunity to go into the classroom for a few more days and get to know my future students a little better. How utterly fantastic! When i met the kids previously i just fell in love with their little selves and now i actually get to be their teacher. i truly feel just...honored with the opportunity. i can't wait.
Because i am a real, honest-to-goodness teacher of the kiddums now. is it August yet??
Before summer school starts, i have the opportunity to go into the classroom for a few more days and get to know my future students a little better. How utterly fantastic! When i met the kids previously i just fell in love with their little selves and now i actually get to be their teacher. i truly feel just...honored with the opportunity. i can't wait.
Because i am a real, honest-to-goodness teacher of the kiddums now. is it August yet??
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
grown-up decisions
it's hard to be a grown-up. And believe me, i definitely do not have it figured out (obviously) but i am trying. Again, it is difficult.
i've been spending time since graduation trying to figure out where i'm going to be next year. Working is the preferred answer. Teaching is the most ideal answer. But where? i tell ya, a most ideal option has crossed my path this week and i just feel good about it. Almost giddy. i shadowed one of the teachers at the school and got to work with some of the students to see just how this school's program worked. The result? The giddy feeling in my little heart. Then...
One of the metaphorical bumps in the metaphorical road of life came along and almost threw me from the road (metaphorically, of course). See, i like having a plan. i always have a plan and i feel great about my plans. When things don't go according to plan i have a hard time figuring out if it's because there's something else better for me or if i'm supposed to patch up that wee little bit of road to make my plan work.
Which lands me in my current position. Debating. Praying. Contemplating. Rewriting my plan 5 different ways. Napping. Researching. Making potential new plans. Seeking counsel of those who have their lives in order.
it's a lot. Hence why napping is part of that list. Making the decision and seeing it through will definitely be rewarding in the end but unfortunately my feelings towards grown-up decisions at the moment are more as follows:
i've been spending time since graduation trying to figure out where i'm going to be next year. Working is the preferred answer. Teaching is the most ideal answer. But where? i tell ya, a most ideal option has crossed my path this week and i just feel good about it. Almost giddy. i shadowed one of the teachers at the school and got to work with some of the students to see just how this school's program worked. The result? The giddy feeling in my little heart. Then...
One of the metaphorical bumps in the metaphorical road of life came along and almost threw me from the road (metaphorically, of course). See, i like having a plan. i always have a plan and i feel great about my plans. When things don't go according to plan i have a hard time figuring out if it's because there's something else better for me or if i'm supposed to patch up that wee little bit of road to make my plan work.
Which lands me in my current position. Debating. Praying. Contemplating. Rewriting my plan 5 different ways. Napping. Researching. Making potential new plans. Seeking counsel of those who have their lives in order.
it's a lot. Hence why napping is part of that list. Making the decision and seeing it through will definitely be rewarding in the end but unfortunately my feelings towards grown-up decisions at the moment are more as follows:
Thursday, May 1, 2014
graduation week
it's official, folks. i am a college graduate! And it is the weirdest feeling. Up until now i've always been in school; always preparing for the next year; everything leading up to this. And now it's done.
The fam in all of their awesomeness came to Utah for the week of my graduation to play with me and Miss Calah (and her family). We missed a couple of the boys and Miss Kierston's family due to previous engagements and whatnot but we did have everyone else. Which is quite the feat considering how big our family is.
it was simply lovely having the nieces and nephews here to play and seeing my siblings. They have always had my best interests at heart and i love them to pieces! This was also the first time we had all of the Toth sisters together in several years where we could sit and talk and simply enjoy. Of course we get together at the holidays but this was different. it's funny to see how similar we all are; our laughs, our phrasing, etc. if i do say so myself, we are also pretty darn funny (the whole fam is really).
Aren't they just fab? (PS i'm still waiting on a picture of me with all of the girls so the selfies will have to suffice).
The fam in all of their awesomeness came to Utah for the week of my graduation to play with me and Miss Calah (and her family). We missed a couple of the boys and Miss Kierston's family due to previous engagements and whatnot but we did have everyone else. Which is quite the feat considering how big our family is.
it was simply lovely having the nieces and nephews here to play and seeing my siblings. They have always had my best interests at heart and i love them to pieces! This was also the first time we had all of the Toth sisters together in several years where we could sit and talk and simply enjoy. Of course we get together at the holidays but this was different. it's funny to see how similar we all are; our laughs, our phrasing, etc. if i do say so myself, we are also pretty darn funny (the whole fam is really).
Aren't they just fab? (PS i'm still waiting on a picture of me with all of the girls so the selfies will have to suffice).
with the parents
with Misses Bryttney and Kierston
with Miss Calah
with Matt and Hyrum - Morgan and Ethan are honorarily there
We spent several days at the Midway house since it had the space to hold us all. We celebrated with cupcakes from The Sweet Tooth Fairy (only the best) for my graduation AND Mom's birthday AND Miss Tovah's birthday (which just so happened to be the very same day as my convocation).
She really is just adorable and crazy smart and crazy creative. An all around awesome kid. :)
Thursday, April 10, 2014
so many fab things!
Miss Momo is a married woman. And they are really the cutest little Hoosier couple you'll ever see. The wedding was small, simple, and absolutely beautiful. i am so excited to see them begin their married life because they are so good for each other and together. Last week at school was Teacher Appreciation Week. Which, when your students know what that means, is a very darling thing. The girls in my class brought me flower clippings and homemade cards throughout the week. it was so sweet because they simply love being at school and they seem to really enjoy having me as a teacher. it makes those slightly rough days worth so worth it because each of these kids is just amazing.
We did just that and had a rather good turnout. i made cupcakes, we brought some snacky things, and great playing was had by all. Miss Momo and her man ended being at the park playing Corn Hole AT THE SAME TiME (it really was a surprise) and they joined us for a wee smidge. They left for dinner and a pickup game of soccer started which ended up being the best thing ever. You know it's been a successful Spring/Summer day when your feet are grass-stained from playing outside. Simply lovely.
The Lawyer also got me hooked on Arrested Development and we're only two episodes away from finishing the whole series. i have to admit (considering i am now hooked) that it really is a fun show. Ever so punny and full of all things hilarious.
On Monday i made myself a book list (surprise, surprise, i know). i've done this countless times but this book list is different. BECAUSE it's in a jar. That's right. i always read the same things which isn't terrible due to the fact that i love them so much; i would like to branch out though. Get into the classics and whatnot. This is hard for me. i like the books i like because they suck me in. i get carried away and don't come back until the adventure is over. i have a hard time believing that's going to happen with the classics. Probably because i had to write papers on the couple i read back in high school...Anyways. So each book was put on it's own wee bit of paper, folded up, starred (it has to be cute, right?) and piled into my darling little star jar. Now, as i finish a book and need something else to read, i simply pull out a slip of paper and read that book. Wonderful, right? i started with Of Mice and Men by Steinbeck per the Lawyer's recommendation (his first recommendation is currently all checked out at the library). So far, so good. it's no Harry Potter but it is nice. We'll see how the rest of these pan out.
i was able to go visit the cemetery this week as well. i feel bad because it's been so long since i've taken flowers over to the family and Reeves (mine and Ethan's adopted buddy since the tree next to his grave provided excellent shade). For a bit there i tried to take flowers every so often to Grandma, her family, and Reeves. And then i forgot. But no longer! They all have fresh, happy, colorful flowers! AND they moved Reeves grave! i almost couldn't find him because he's no longer by his tree. He's out in the open sunshine. Thankfully, i did find him.
Life has some fab things going on. All of the above plus my upcoming graduation and a potential teaching job for next year (when i know if it's a for sure or not, i'll actually explain about that). Just, fabbity-fab things.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)